Monday, July 5, 2010

Roid Rage Again

I had my endocrine doctor appointment on Friday. It seems like I'm getting too much steroids based on certain things (my "moon face," acne, etc), but, it also seems like I'm not getting enough at times, based on my other symptoms (shakiness, dizziness, fast heart rate). We think that some of the problem is that I don't consistently absorb all of the medicine. The dose I'm at is more than twice what a normal adult male needs... so WAY more than I should need. So when I absorb it all, it's too much, but if I don't absorb it well, I'm not getting enough. Either way, it's terrible for my body. The plan is to split up the dosage into three times a day instead of two. This way, even if I don't absorb much, I have more chances to absorb some. And hopefully I can taper off more easily if I'm getting some steroids three times a day. If this doesn't work, I will have to look into giving myself shots of steroids every day. Which would be okay if I got the huge muscles... ;)

I was a little frustrated because the doctor doubts that my symptoms - the shakiness, dizziness, dumping, etc, which have been making a comeback for the last week or so - are actually caused by too little steroids. My labs and tests don't seem to indicate that I'm low on steroids, and when I "crash," sometimes taking more steroids helps, sometimes it doesn't. I understand what she's saying, but I don't know what else could be making me feel so bad (neither does she). And I know for sure that every single time I cut back, I feel worse. She told me that I have to keep tapering off, regardless of how bad it makes me feel. If I do crash as I taper, I'm supposed to page her so she can see me when I'm crashing. This could be fun.

Honestly... I want more than anything to be off steroids. I never wanted to go on them in the first place back in September. I only took them because my choices were essentially: bleed to death, do IV steroids in the hospital or do high-dose oral steroids at home. I opted for the oral steroids after some deliberation. ;) Anyways, I've always hated being on steroids because they make me crazy emotional and I feel horrible when I come off them. I've always had a hard time tapering off, but never anything that compares to what I've gone through this time. Every time I have gotten off steroids, I swear I'll never take them again. I guess my resolve this fall wasn't firm enough, haha.

I'm still feeling kinda crummy. The rainy weather is doing a number on my joints and I'm having issues again with blockages or something. I think it's from scar tissue. Just really hurts when I eat. I'd appreciate prayers for wisdom to know if it's bad enough that I should call the doctor, although there's not much they can do about it.

Please pray for my body to respond well to the new 3x/day steroid plan, and that I will adjust as I decrease the dose a little bit this week! I need to be able to taper down quite a bit before we can even tell if my body is still able to make its own steroids.

I'm trying to navigate the murky waters of health insurance... thankfully, it looks like I can extend my student health insurance through next summer! After that... I'd rather not think about it! I'm also looking for a job starting this fall. Please pray for me as I try to figure out what I'm capable of doing and that God will lead me to just the right job.

Hannah ;)

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