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Sunday, February 19, 2012

Twenty Questions With Myself

My wound, the wound that has been trying to heal since June 28, the wound that we treated with a WoundVAC for 80 days and thrice-weekly wound care at a facility an hour away for months, the wound that began to improve after weekly injections of a chemo drug, the wound which had decreased to smaller than a paper clip...

... has split open.

I cried. 

Dr. Saturday warned me that I had to be careful, that wounds in this, um, area (between the cheeks) tend to rip open at this stage. He was right. I don't even know what I did that made it open up again. All I know is that Friday, it was tiny, and then yesterday... it was two or three times bigger.

I had to play "Twenty Questions" with myself.

Did I do something irresponsible, intentional or sinful to make it open up?
No.
Is God in control?
Yes.
So did He know that this was going to happen?
Yes.
Did He allow, and in fact, ordain for this to happen?
Yes.

Can you please remember that God parted the Red Sea for His people?
Yes.
Hasn't God done much harder things than heal a little wound?
Yes.
Isn't He powerful enough to overcome a setback with your wound?
Yes.

Isn't your health better now, in some ways, than it was a year ago?
Yes.
Hasn't God allowed you to reach a healthy weight, caused your arthritis to greatly improve, decreased your belly pain, and grow much healthier?
Yes.
Hasn't God allowed your wound to go from large(10 cm long, and 8 cm deep) to minuscule?
Yes.
So is there any reason to doubt that He cannot heal this wound?
No.

Is God good?
Yes. 
Doesn't He cause all things to work together for good for those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose?

Yes.

Well....then BUCK UP, Hannah! ;)

Or, to put it more poetically:

"For I know, whate'er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well."

Hannah ;)

1 comment:

  1. Oh, bless your heart! I want to cry for you! But I rejoice with you that we have an all-powerful, sovereign, loving God who does all things in His perfect wisdom and perfect love and perfect timing. "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3 That should just about cover it for you :-)

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