I finished my last post by saying something about not allowing my emotions get involved as doctors toss around a wide array of possibilities for how to help me. This ended up being good, because, once again, the plan has changed! I was supposed to get the abscess taken care of through a CT guided drain placement yesterday or today. BUT on Monday, the Urogyn reviewed my MRI with a Radiologist, and what they found raised some questions.
I'm not sure I totally understand what they said, but I *think* that there is some doubt about the location of the abscess. It is either in my pelvis or inside one of my fallopian tubes. The treatments for a pelvic abscess is totally different than that of an infection inside a fallopian tube. If the abscess is indeed in the tube, they would want to remove the tube. And they probably would have to do an open surgery, not laparoscopic. They think that I will have too much scar tissue and adhesions due to all my surgeries and infections. This would be a lengthy hospital stay and recovery. And I am supposed to start school in 2.5 weeks.
Anyways, today I had another MRI done. Please pray that this MRI gives them the information that they need about the location of the infection, and that they send the report to Dr. Saturday tomorrow. I pray that Dr. Saturday calls me tomorrow and that we can get moving on a plan before the weekend hits. But honestly... I hope that the MRI shows that there is no more fluid or abscess or anything and I'm totally fine and don't need any more surgeries. ;) That would be really amazing! And God can do that if He wants!
As my doctors try to determine the location of the infection, I'm trying to determine what MY location should be - starting school or not. No matter what the outcome is, I pray that God will be glorified in my life. If He wants me in school, then I'll be in school. If He has different plans, then I won't be in school. More than any career or degree, I want my location to be where He wants me to be.
I've been listening to a song that's really helped me keep my focus on God. Right now, I can't think about tomorrow, because I'm not supposed to and it does no good and just makes me crazy. there are a lot of "what ifs," and I simply can't allow my mind to go there.
"My hope is in You, Lord, all the day long,
I won't be shaken by drought or storm,
The peace that passes understanding is my song,
And I say, "My hope is in You, Lord!""
I think that living with my hope in God is the best location I could be in.